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Our Story - Written by Tracey Huggins

02 February 2021

Part one:

My life changed in so many ways after giving birth to our beautiful baby girl... and it took me quite a long time to understand my feelings after being told of the difficulties I would have with Delilah. It wasn’t until someone told me that I had to allow myself to grieve that it finally twigged... the penny dropped and it was all very clear. Now, don’t get me wrong it took me a good while to work out why on earth i’d grieve when I had a beautiful baby girl alive and kicking in front of me but once it clicked I understood what kind of bumpy ride I was gearing up for...

You see no one gives you a heads up about these things, no one tells you what is around the corner, how you may feel, what may come your way but also how very normal it is. How it is normal to grieve your child that is lay beside you, shedding tears while watching their chest rise and fall with every breath. How it is normal to feel guilt, over the pregnancy, the birth or like me... the fact I didn’t produce the healthy child I had promised my husband. You see I had promised my husband a child we could take to the park, watch grow up with our other two children and all my family were expecting the same. But you see, none of this was my fault. And none of this is yours. 
Welcome to the wonderfully special club, that no one asks to be in.
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